Turned away at Bedford VA hospital, a life lost Veteran's suicide adds to questions about response, policies Lowell Sun
By Todd Feathers UPDATED: 12/30/2017
He sought care at VA hospitals in Arizona, Wyoming, and South Dakota. About three years ago, Earles decided to move to Massachusetts.
BEDFORD -- Byron Wade Earles sat hunched over, his head resting in his hands, by Building 78 of the Edith Nourse Rogers Memorial Veterans Hospital.
The nurse who rushed out to help found him bleeding and despondent.
"They wouldn't admit me," he told her, according to an account of the incident in Earles' medical records. "They wouldn't help me."
As the nurse spoke with him, Earles took out a knife and began to cut his throat.
Byron Earles, a homeless Army veteran, tried to commit suicide on Nov. 7, 2016 after the Bedford VA hospital s mental health clinic denied him admission. He died by suicide two months later. (PHOTO COURTESY OF PAUL EARLES)
The 44-year-old Army veteran had arrived at the Bedford VA mental health walk-in clinic on Nov. 7, 2016 -- days after being discharged from the Brockton VA -- asking to be admitted to the hospital because he was thinking about hurting himself and others.
The Bedford clinic turned him away, according to a portion of Earles' medical records obtained by The Sun, because a mental health worker did not believe his account of a recent suicide attempt and suspected he wanted to escape the cold. Maureen Heard, a spokeswoman for the hospital, said Earles left of his own accord after a psychiatrist suggested he seek a homeless shelter. Hospital administrators declined an interview request, but Heard said several clinic policies changed as a result of the Earles incident.
While Earles didn't die that day -- two VA police officers convinced him to drop the knife so the nurse could treat his wound -- he did die by suicide two months later, on Jan. 6, after walking out of a counseling session at the Bedford hospital.
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This is the Eve of a New Year. I hope it can be the the beginning of the year you stop feeling so much pain and begin to rejoice for all the love you still have within you. Strange idea since right now you may be feeling as if love left you a long time ago, but I can assure you, it is all still there. It is trapped behind a wall of pain and bad memories. The truth is, it was love that caused you to put your life on the line in the first place. What did you think it was? Courage? You could have done other things if that was all there was to it. You needed courage to do your job but you needed love to even want to do it. I have a confession that isn't easy to open up about. As a Chaplain, it is hard to admit that I am struggling with hope right now. Don't worry because I've been in this spiritual place many times before. Maybe it is good to be reminded of what it is like to be in darkness from time to time and that way, I stay more connected to the very souls I am here to help. I was searching my site to find some words of wisdom for myself. Oh, I've been known to do that a time or two. When I read it, I decided to share it because it actually helped lift me up a bit. I know that right now, I couldn't write anything better. So, here is a repost of something I wrote back in 2014. Out of the shadow of death comes hope Wounded Times Kathie Costos August 6, 2014 There is plenty of time to talk about veterans suffering, families suffering, instead of healing and living better lives. With only so many hours in a day, we have to make times to talk about what is hopeful as well. There is a beautiful line by David Rossi on Criminal Minds (Joe Mantegna) "Scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going." When you are wounded and your skin is cut, you expect to stop bleeding and see your scars to heal. If you have a broken bone, after your skin has healed, the bone will heal but the scar remains. No one can see it but you can still feel it. So why not when your soul is wounded? Why wouldn't you assume that the scar you can only feel inside your body would heal as well as what is outside of your body? Combat changed you. It changes everyone. For some it is because you have a great strength within you to feel things more deeply. That strength also allowed you to feel more pain. It does not mean you are stuck the feeling it. PTSD is part of change and you can change again. Your life is determined by you and what you do to heal. Everything you need to heal is already inside of you.
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is great if you go to church but you don't have to. Most of the veterans I know believe in God and Christ, but they do not attend church. When you consider Christ prayed more outside than inside, praying where you are when you want to is not that unusual. How do you pray if you believe He judged you? How do you ask for help when you think He did it to you as some sort of cosmic judgment to teach you a lesson? Well, if that is the way you think then it wouldn't make much sense. Try it this way. He put that tug into your soul to join the military so that you could save others. You did it because He gave you everything you needed to do what you had to. That also includes healing. Why did you want to risk your life for total strangers? Endure countless hardships and sacrifices? Was it for glory? No, most veterans don't want to be called "hero" and even most Medal of Honor recipients take no credit for what they did. By the way, many of them are talking openly about their own battles with PTSD. It wasn't for the money because when you break down how many hours you put in, especially when deployed, you'd probably make more working less dangerous jobs. It wasn't for personal security because any day could have been your last day. It was because you were created to be what you were. Remember God created a warrior before He created mankind. The Archangel Michael. Michael is an obvious identity for a tattoo, as this is the most powerful of angels. Maureen Tilley, professor of theology at Fordham University.
The Book of Revelation (12:7-9) describes a war in heaven in which Michael, being stronger, defeats Satan: "...there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven." After the conflict, Satan is thrown to earth along with the fallen angels, where he ("that ancient serpent called the devil") still tries to "lead the whole world astray". Separately, in the Epistle of Jude 1:9 Michael is specifically referred to as an "archangel" when he again confronts Satan:
What is going on inside of you is a battle between good and evil but not the way you may think. It is a fight between what is "good" about you that caused you so much pain and what you may think is "evil" about you and it is a spiritual battle you can win. One other thing you need to know right here and right now is a very simple fact. Evil people do not grieve for someone else. They do not feel guilty about surviving and they do not feel pain the way you are. It is what is good within you that grieves. You can find peace and change for the better. Psalm 23 King James Version (KJV)
"Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart."Peter 1:22
This is the kind of love that you have within you.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away"
"Sixth beatitude of the Sermon on the Mount: Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God" (Matthew 5:8). The Greek word καθαρος translated pure, literally means: "free from the admixture or adhesion of any thing that soils, adulterates or corrupts,"F1 hence, "clean, pure." The lexiconsicographers define the term as: "pure or clean," i.e. "unsoiled or unalloyed."F2 Some believe this verse has reference to "the moral blamelessness of the inner life, the center of which is the heart."F3 Others believe Jesus is referring to one who is "clean, pure, in a spiritual sense, from the pollution and guilt of sin."
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
You did not "want" for yourself more than you "wanted" for others or you wouldn't have joined the military prepared to sacrifice and endure hardships for their sake.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.
The valley of the shadow of death is a place you can leave. The shadow of war does not have to follow you for the rest of your life and you don't have to forget about it in order to heal from it. The "house of the Lord" is the body your soul lives in. He knew you before you came into this body of yours. "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart"Jeremiah 1 Everything was already in your soul when you were sent to this earth. When given a choice which path to take, you decided to serve others. Your courage was there just as much as your compassion was there. Many times soldiers in battle still manage to reach out an arm for a buddy, shed a tear, offer a prayer or a kind word. That requires goodness within you so strong that even the horrors of war cannot defeat it. "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."Jeremiah 29:11 War caused the pain you felt but you refused to allow it to stop you. You still risked your life no matter how much turmoil you were experiencing. Begin to heal by looking at yourself the way you were before military life, before training, before combat and remember what love was in John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
Being willing to die for the sake of someone else, came from love and that has always been within you. Forgive yourself for what you feel you need to be forgiven for and forgive anyone you need to. This is how you start to change again and heal. Then you can help someone else heal as well. Right now, get stronger so you can be there for them.
Iraq war vet's battle to overcome PTSD Grimsby Telegraph By Jack Longstaff 31 DEC 2017
46-year-old Iraq and Afghanistan war veteran, John, struggled to reintegrate back into society after leaving the army
PTSD war veteran 'John' has spoken about his struggle to reintegrate himself into society after leaving the armed forces. Pictured are British soldiers from 29 Commando Regiment Royal Artillery return from a security patrol to their camp in the Kuwait desert near to the Iraq border March 15, 2003
An Iraq war veteran who struggled to adapt to life outside of the army has spoken of how if it wasn't for "life saving" intervention by a Grimsby mental health crisis team, he would take his own life.
Sitting in the crisis assessment room at Navigo's mental health clinic in Grimsby, wearing a Help for Heroes shirt and clasping a mug of black coffee, John (not his real name), bravely opened up to talk about his struggle to reintegrate himself into society after leaving the armed forces.
For the 46-year-old army vet, who served in both Iraq and Afghanistan between 2003 and 2010, wants to use his story of suffering with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) to encourage other men to talk about mental health troubles.
"Nothing makes you any less of a man because you've got mental health issues. Don't feel ashamed", says John, whose life spiraled out of control when he left the army in 2012. read more here
Marines raise money to bring Afghan puppies home from deployment
FOX 17 News
Rebecca Russell
December 30, 2017
HELMAND PROVINCE, Afghanistan-- Some West Michigan Marines deployed overseas will be bringing home a little piece of Afghanistan to Michigan. They found two puppies and with the help of loved ones back home, they raised enough money for vet bills and the long trip back home to Michigan.
Hayden Gort is currently deployed to Helmand Province, Afghanistan. His team found a puppy going through their garbage a few weeks ago. Another platoon found a different puppy on the side of the road while out on patrol. They've been taking care of them ever since and soon they'll be on a plane back to West Michigan.
It all started three weeks ago.
"Me and my team were taking the trash out in the morning as we do every morning," said Gort. "We saw one of the trash bags moving and was somewhat empty. There was a puppy laying in it trying to dig through the trash to find food."
That's when they found the puppy they would name Sabula. read more here