Sunday, September 3, 2017

Unafraid to Condemn the Unaware Raising Suicide Awareness

Experts Are Necessary to Do More Than Talk
Combat PTSD Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
September 3, 2017

"Don't be intimidated by people who seem to be experts. Hear their points of view and get their judgements. But at the end of day, you've got to make a judgement because it's not their life that's going to be affected so much as your future." Robert Dallek

It seems like everyday someone left behind by suicide goes to the press for publicity on what they are doing, then show how little they really know about how to change the outcome for others.

As soon as I read them being quoted with "22 a day" or "20 a day" the hairs on the back of my neck send electrical shocks into my brain! How does talking about a number that is factually untrue do any good for anyone other than the one seeking publicity?




No one can help veterans find their way out of darkness if they do not know how they got lost in the first place. It is all so easy to talk about stuff that did not merit their time to research. While those left behind are experts on the pain they feel, they are nowhere near being able to change the outcome.

The purpose of "Watchfires" is severalfold -- not only to salute our dead of the War but also to acknowledge the living power they still have to touch us in so many ways. Their examples of courage, honor, and sacrifice set a standard for those who survived them; and our memories of them add strength and depth to our lives.

I'll read about their heartbreaking story, know they still feel the pain. Apparently, they really want to make sure that others do not have to go through it like they did. The problem is, apparently they decided it was not worth investing the time and energy to actually be able to make a difference.

While they could make a difference for others in a support group, they decided they knew enough to talk about a report they failed to read. If it was so important to them, wouldn't it be important enough to learn how to help or at least spend time to learn what the truth is?

Here are the facts they did not bother to learn yet decided they would be the ones to change the outcome, without bothering to discover how to do it.

Veteran Suicide "22 a day"
Was taken from a report from the VA in 2012
The report was from 21 states with suicide as cause of death and stating military service. We have 50 states. The report also stated that even from those 21 states, it was limited data.

It did not help that the press was jumping over the slogan instead of reading the report, or actually understanding that current military numbers on suicides are not part of the VA suicide report. Two different categories.
Suicide Rate Among Vets and Active Duty Military Jumps - Now 22 A Day, Forbes


Veteran Suicides "20 a day"
While the CDC does know the number of known suicides (accidental or questionable ones are not included) they do not know military service connection from far too many states. California does not have it on their certificates of death. They have over 2 million veterans. Illinois does not have military service on their certificates of death. They have over 700,000 veterans.

As the "awareness raisers" are counting numbers they do not understand, they are showing the veterans in need of healing cannot count on them to do more than talk about their heartache!

After over a decade of "suicide prevention" and  seven years of "PTSD awareness" the evidence shows that this has done nothing to change the outcome. Considering there is the Crisis Line for veterans and family members to call and over 400,000 new veterans charities across the country claiming to be working to change the outcome, it is actually worse than it was in 1999.


Worse but seems to be the same? Yes, because at the time there were 5 million more veterans in the country.

I spent 2 years researching what experts started to understand a decade before I even heard the term PTSD. As I learned, I shared it with other veterans and families. Then I knew enough to write about it. After 35 years, I've heard it all and read way too much to be able to accept the fact that any of this should be acceptable to anyone!


Saturday, September 2, 2017

The only thing I want to hear is, they are worth fighting for.

Are You Ready to Fight For Love?
Combat PTSD Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
September 2, 2017

"I'm telling you I'm not going." Words to a song or words we live by? The choice is ours, but if we stay, we better ready for the war that hasn't ended after any war. 

I don't want to hear it is too hard to stay. I did it for 35 years and we're having our 33rd wedding anniversary. I get it. It sucks to be in a position where you're fighting a battle no one trained you to fight. THEN TRAIN YOURSELF! This is a war that was brought to the front door of you heart.

I don't want to hear it is too hard for you to understand. I went to work right out of high school but ended up reading clinical books at the library with a dictionary because I had no clue what the psychiatrists were writing about. I didn't understand Vietnam because when my Vietnam veteran was there, I was only 11 years old. 

You don't even have to get out of your PJs. All you have to do is turn on your computer or power up your tablet or get online with your cell phone to find what you're looking for. The problem is, if you are not looking for the thing that will help change your life and your veteran's life, then you are not going to find it.

The only thing I want to hear is, they are worth fighting for. Mine was and still is. Frankly that is what pisses me off the most. Too many take the easy way out and walk away from them because "rough times are showing" and they find excuses to leave instead of expectations to hope for.

My buddy Gunny just called me an ornery PITA, "pain in the ass" when I told him about being set off with Suicide Awareness Month. We are not even close to getting to the point where we're talking more about marriages like mine than widows visiting graves.
I'm Not Living Without You
And I am telling you I'm not going
Even though the rough times are showing
There's just no way - there's no way

We're part of the same place

We're part of the same time
We both share the same blood
We both have the same mind



These are the things you should be reading and you don't even have to search for them. Here are the links.

National Center for PTSD

  • What is PTSD? | ¿Qué es el TEPT?
    Find out about the symptoms of PTSD and how they develop.
  • Symptoms of PTSD | Síntomas del TEPT
    Learn about PTSD symptoms and when to get help.
  • How Common is PTSD?
    Find out how many people have PTSD and who is most likely to develop PTSD.
  • History of PTSD in Veterans: Civil War to DSM-5
    Learn about the history of the diagnosis of PTSD in a timeline that reflects military events and the importance of Veterans.
  • Early attempts at a medical diagnosis
    Accounts of psychological symptoms following military trauma date back to ancient times. The American Civil War (1861-1865) and the Franco-Prussian War (1870-1871) mark the start of formal medical attempts to address the problems of military Veterans exposed to combat. European descriptions of the psychological impact of railroad accidents also added to early understanding of trauma-related conditions.
  • Understanding PTSD and PTSD Treatment
    Find out more in this quick guide to PTSD Basics.
It PTSD isn't new at all!

The Civil War killed and injured over a million Americans, roughly a third of all those who served. This grim tally, however, doesn’t include the conflict’s psychic wounds. Military and medical officials in the 1860s had little grasp of how war can scar minds as well as bodies. Mental ills were also a source of shame, especially for soldiers bred on Victorian notions of manliness and courage. For the most part, the stories of veterans like Hildt have languished in archives and asylum files for over a century, neglected by both historians and descendants.

You may have been waisting your time with nonsense yesterday, but you just ran out of excuses. It is all there if you bother to look for it. The question is, are you ready to fight to stay, or not?

Suicide Prevention: "VA can’t – and should not – do this alone.”

September Marks Suicide Prevention Month
Department of Veterans Affairs
09/01/2017


WASHINGTON – The message from the Department of Veterans Affairs to the friends and families of Veterans during Suicide Prevention Month is simple: Be There.

“We know that in 2014, an average of 20 Veterans a day died in this country from suicide, which is 20 too many,” said VA Secretary David J. Shulkin. “This is a national public health crisis requiring a national public health approach. When it comes to preventing Veteran suicide, VA can’t – and should not – do this alone.”

For Suicide Prevention Month, VA has a number of outreach events planned to raise awareness. Among some of the top events planned:
A number of declaration signings will be held throughout the month within the entire VA health care system, the Department of Defense, Veteran service organizations and with other partners around the country that show a commitment of solidarity to prevent Veteran suicides.

Each VA facility will also be asked to commit to Be There, ensuring Veterans get the mental health support they need through a “no wrong door” philosophy. The VA declaration promises:
To adopt a “no wrong door” philosophy for suicide prevention so every VA employee will assist Veterans in need;
To work with our Community Veteran Engagement Boards or other community partner in suicide prevention efforts;
To establish a “buddy system” so Veterans can reach out to someone when needed;
To continue implementation of Press 7, for our telephone systems, where feasible, to provide immediate access to the Veterans and Military Crisis Line
To establish open access in our facility mental health clinics and same day access in our community based mental health clinics within six months, to ensure prompt attention to the needs of our Veterans;
To work across clinical specialties to ensure Veterans receive integrated speciality pain managaement and sleep services as needed;
To ensure all staff and employees clinical suicide prevention training;
To arrange appointments for Veterans seeking care through Enhanced Enrollment procedures; and
To increase the number of Veterans and providers connecting through our Telemental Health services.
A suicide prevention toolkit is being distributed around the country to stakeholders and community partners.

A number of partnerships will be announced including a national network of volunteer professionals at Give an Hour to expand community-based mental health services for Veteran and military communities.

Outreach efforts will target communities and military units that are experiencing high rates of suicide. We are not waiting until they are in crisis.

VA is continuing its work with the Department of Defense to identify at-risk service members and enroll them for VA care and engage them through community programs before they transition out of the military, with a day planned in which employees of both departments will be encouraged to wear the same color to show commitment to suicide prevention.

Monthlong social media events are planned including a Thunderclap, twitter and blog posts; Instagram takehover; Facebook live and other social media media events targeted at suicide prevention.

Veterans in crisis can call the Veterans Crisis Line for confidential support 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year at 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1, chat online at VeteransCrisisLine.net/Chat, or text to 838255. Veterans can also visit Make the Connection, a powerful network of stories of recovery, to learn more: http://maketheconnection.net. For more information and resources, visit and VeteransCrisisLine.net/BeThere VeteransCrisisLine.net/SpreadTheWord.

Reporters covering this issue are strongly encouraged to visit www.ReportingOnSuicide.Org for important guidance on ways to communicate on suicide.

Police Officer Pulled Veteran Over To Thank Him

Police officer pulls over a man because he looks like his dead son; what he sees on the dashboard

Connect Statesboro
Melinda Fox
September 1, 2017


Jazwinski concluded his Facebook post with these words:
"To all the family and friends of soldiers, fighting or done fighting, God bless you. Your peace and your hearts. It's so hard without them, I know. This road is a tremendous one. Love to all."


'I still don't believe it most days he's gone.' By Melinda Fox Sept. 1, 2017

William Jazwinski didn't know why a police officer pulled him over on April 18. He asked the officer if he had been speeding.

The officer responded, "No, not speeding. Just wanted to stop ya and say thank you for your service."

Jazwinski remembered the bumper sticker on his vehicle that identified him as a member of the military and began chatting with the officer about his military service.

Jazwinski had served 15 months as a heavy wheel vehicle operator in Iraq. Now home, he had just completed a post-traumatic stress disorder program and kept the folded U.S. flag he received from the military on the dashboard of his truck.

It was this flag that prompted the officer to open up about the real reason he had pulled Jazwinski over.

The officer told Jazwinski that he had been sent a flag in honor of his son who was in the military as well. He said, "My son went to Iraq. He didn't make it home."

The police officer continued, "You remind me of my son. I pulled you over. I thought you were him. I still don't believe it most days he's gone."

The officer then asked Jazwinski, "Do you mind stepping out and receiving a hug?"

Jazwinski admits that this hug was something that not only the police officer needed, but he needed, too.

"With tears in both our eyes I got out and hugged that man. I'm talking about for a minute or two crying. Down to our knees crying. I needed that."
read more here

Iraq Veteran Helps Others Heal PTSD After 8 Suicide Attempts in One Year

Veteran talks about suicide to help other Veterans

Department of Veterans Affairs
August 29, 2017


“Helping my fellow Veterans at the VA has made me whole again. At this point, I wouldn’t dream of doing anything else.” Alexandra Gries
She tried to take her own life eight times in one year while serving as a soldier in the 4th Infantry Division in 2008. The stressors of combat, losing a couple of very close friends in battle and adapting to life back in the U.S. after serving in Iraq was too much for her to handle.
And when she left the Army a few months later after being assigned to a wounded warrior unit – and she came back to Fresno where she grew up – things didn’t get any better. But she went to VA for help, and the process of healing began.
Alexandrea Gries, now a peer support specialist with the VA Central California Health Care System, has come a long way in eight years thanks to the VA in Fresno and the people who work there, she said.
Starting out at the VA as a volunteer and work study student, escorting patients by wheelchair and working in the canteen store, the kitchen and then the coffee shop – Gries said she realized right away VA was a place she could relate to, and the people there were people she could relate with.
“I developed a very strong kinship,” Gries said. “I love these people, and this is the only family I have now.”
“Alexandrea Gries is a true leader. She has impacted so many lives in a positive way, and she’s been through so much,” said Mary Golden, the VA CCHCS Voluntarily Service Program manager.
Pushing Wheel Chairs Nine Hours a Day – “I love these Vets.”
Although she knows she’ll probably never fully recover from the scars of war, Gries said she believes the healing starts with sharing her experiences with others.