by Chaplain Kathie
Wounded Times Blog
August 15, 2012
Lately this has been in the news but for military families, it has been our lives for years.
This is one of my videos from 2006.
Come In From The Rain
Melissa Manchester
Well, hello there
Good old friend of mine
You've been reaching for yourself
For such a long time
There's so much to say
No need to explain
Just an open door for you
To come in from the rain
It's a long road
When you're all alone
And someone like you
Will always choose the long way home
There's no right or wrong
I'm not here to blame
I just want to be the one
Who keeps you from the rain
From the rain
And it looks like sunny skies
Now that I know you're alright
Time has left us older
Wiser, I know I am
'Cause I think of us
Like an old cliche
But it doesn't matter
'Cause I love you anyway
Come in from the rain
And it looks like sunny skies
Now that I know you're alright
Time has left us older
But Wiser, I know I am
And it's good to know
My best friend has come home again
'Cause I think of us
Like an old cliche
But it doesn't matter
'Cause I love you anyway
Come in from the rain
Come in from the rain
Come in from the rain
Pay attention to this article now that know this.
Couples Therapy Cuts PTSD, Improves RelationshipsFamilies are on the front lines of helping them to heal. We can make life harder for them if we don't understand, settle for the excuse of we can't understand when the truth is we didn't want to bother to try. Or we can learn as much about what PTSD is doing to them as we took the time to learn enough about them to fall in love. If you love them, then know them before and remember what they were like after PTSD became a part of them. They are still in there. You can help them come in from the rain! I did. Next month will be 28 years of being married to my Vietnam Vet husband. We did it when no one was talking about PTSD, the internet was not in every home and no one was talking about PTSD. It was a secret.
By KATIE MOISSE
ABC News
Aug. 15, 2012
Former Army Captain Michael Waldrop and his wife, Marnie, credit counseling for their lasting marriage. (Courtesy Marnie Waldrop)
Michael Waldrop came home from work with a bottle of Jack Daniels and a letter that read, "Report for duty in 30 days."
The married father of two young children – a member of the Army's Inactive Ready Reserve – had been plucked from his job as vice president of a contracting company to serve on the front lines in Afghanistan.
It was 2005, four years into Operation Enduring Freedom. And Waldrop – businessman-turned-Army Captain – found himself leading 60 soldiers through some of Afghanistan's most violent villages.
"All I wanted was to return to my family," said Waldrop, who earned a Purple Heart and two Bronze Stars during his 18-month deployment. "I thought coming home would be like heaven. I never thought there would be adjustment issues."
But Waldrop had changed. Long after the scars of a shrapnel wound healed, the painful memories of fallen friends and injured civilians lingered. He had post-traumatic stress disorder – anxiety in the form of anger, numbness and nightmares.
"I knew he was a different person. And I was, too," said Marnie Waldrop, who was forced to juggle work and single parenthood amid the looming fear of her husband's death. "But the last thing I wanted was to end up divorced like the statistics say."
According to statistics, veterans with PTSD are twice as likely to separate from a spouse or divorce. But a new study suggests couples therapy can cut PTSD symptoms and keep families together.
"The best way to think of it is as a PTSD treatment that happens to be delivered to couples," said study author Candice Monson, professor of psychology at Ryerson University in Toronto. "We tried to take what we know about trauma recovery – that social support and interpersonal relationships are some of the most important factors for overcoming traumatic events – and incorporate that into PTSD treatment."
read more here
If you want to know what our life was like click the tab at the top For the Love of Jack. It covers 18 years of our life together. This is the point I have been focused on for the last 30 years. Families matter and they actually need more support than the veteran does because we provide the support to the veteran.
We are the ones with them all day, every day but above that, we love them.
I have no patience when I hear someone say they cannot understand them, it is too complicated to learn. If I could learn, so can you. You don't have to spend 30 years or invest countless hours a day. I can cut it short for you and you can avoid all the mistakes I made in the beginning. You don't have to feel alone or frustrated and you can have the tools to make your family stronger.
This is one of the reasons why I am working with Point Man International Ministries. They understood how important families are in 1984. We have Home Front for the families and Out Posts for the veterans. If you have a group, I can come out and talk to you, give you common sense answers in plain English so you won't have to read all the technical terminology in clinical books or spend hours in training sessions. Best of all is that it is all free.
I ask for a donation for the book but if you can't afford to make a donation, just email me and I'll get you a pdf of it. My videos are online, for free and you can find the PTSD videos on the Great American tab at the top of this blog.
If it is too late to save your marriage, you can still learn so that you will forgive them and yourself. If it is too late because someone you loved committed suicide, you can still learn that it was not your fault. No one told you what you needed to know to cope any better than you did.
None of this is hopeless!
If you live in Florida and would like to help other families, I am the State Coordinator and we need help to reach the other families and give them the support they need.
