Stressed out caregiver

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
October 3, 3023

If you are a caregiver, you deserve a superhero cape! In my case, the witch hat is more appropriate considering that is the way I feel most of the day.

I had to learn that taking care of my husband and 6-month-old puppy during most of the day has to include time for me to take care of myself. If I don't include myself on the to-do list then I won't be much good to those depending on me to do what they can't do for themselves. Top that off if, I'm cranky doing it, that won't help their mood or mine.

Choosing to put limits on what we do, and when we do it, is hard when we don't want to admit we're human and doing the best we can when they want it all! Our lives are on hold and that can be frustrating on top of everything else we have going on. 

For us, we're supposed to be enjoying retirement, or that's what I thought it was supposed to be like. What we were supposed to be and what we are are two totally different things. Figuring it out is a struggle.

The best advice I can give is to do what you can, when you can, as much as you can. Learn to let go of what you can't do. Make peace with it. Take time to do something you enjoy instead of trying to spend 24-7 taking care of everyone else. Breathe and, yes let out the grunt you're trying to hold in. If you can be sarcastic, that works for me too. (Okay, that works magic on my mood when I laugh at how impossible becomes possible.) It's also a lot better to spend the day without being a witch about all of it.

UPDATE

The post I put up proved that I am totally stressed out! I fixed it but what I regret most of all was leaving out one more thing that is vital to all caregivers. ASK FOR HELP WHEN YOU NEED IT! If we don't think we should need it, because we're the ones helping, remember everyone needs help. Even you!

UCF Restores Program helping people under stress from Coronavirus Pandemic

UCF Restores Program Offering Coronavirus Mental Health Help

My News 13
BY JUSTIN SOTO ORANGE COUNTY
APR. 12, 2020

"We thought this was a good opportunity to reach out to the community in general, talk about stress, talk about how to manage stress and give us an opportunity to see if we can help people during this time when a lot of us may be feeling kind of shut in and alone," Beidel said.

ORLANDO, Fla. — Starting Monday, the University of Central Florida will be bringing a new mental health resource geared towards helping people manage stress during these uniquely challenging times.

UCF Restores will post video sessions on Facebook page twice a week
Sessions aimed at providing tools to help deal with stress
Learn more at UCFrestores.org

The University of Central Florida Restores program is working to help you and your family deal with the stress the coronavirus pandemic can bring.

UCF Restores is a clinical research program that regularly helps veterans, active duty personnel, and survivors of mass shootings or sexual assault through post-traumatic stress disorder.
read it here A couple of years ago, I interviewed Dr. Beidel about this progam.

Dr. Deborah Beidel delivered a message that veterans and responders need to hear. You can fight to #TakeBackYourLife. It takes a lot of work, but there are a lot of people out there who are ready, willing and able, to fight right by your side.

Vietnam veteran's birthday dance went viral for a reason

Dancing veteran goes viral on Steve Harvey Talk Show Instagram account

Author: Madeleine Dart
March 6, 2019

At just 68-years-old Michael Clay has some moves.

CORPUS CHRISTI, Texas — He calls it his 'birthday dance.' At 68-years-old, Vietnam Veteran Michael Clay can break it down.

"Dancing is a relief of tension," Clay said.

The Corpus Christi native now lives in Port Lavaca, but his family is still in the Coastal Bend. On his birthday, March 3rd, Clay's family gathered to celebrate. He said his daughter Loye, begged for him to break out the dance.

"She said Daddy, you gotta do the dance video, your fans are waiting and I said 'what fans? I don't have any fans!'" he said.

Yet, Clay is seen dancing his daughter's Instagram and just a couple days after, the video went viral.

So viral, that Steve Harvey shared it on his Instagram page.

"It's been so great, you know?"

Now, the video has garnered over 200 thousand views on Facebook.

Clay said his dancing started when he was young and kept him busy while he served as a U.S. Marine.

"Somebody put some music on and we were missing home so much, so the guys kept having me dance and dance and dance," Clay said.
read more here