Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
August 23, 2014
About a month ago Wounded Times posted the story of Randy Abbott "
Paralyzed veteran beaten and robbed causes international reaction of love." What got to most people was not as much about what he did in the military, but what he did with his life after an operation to help him ended up paralyzing him.
When asked his reaction to the outbreak of love and compassion generated by his story, Abbott is visibly shaken.
"When I have people who don't even know me and they call me from Hawaii, Australia and France and say 'Hey, just get back in the water and surf and you're gonna be ok. We love you buddy!' That means a lot to me."
KUSI News San Diego
Randy does what he can to help others enjoy surfing but more than that, he's helping them learn they can still enjoy life no matter what happened to them. To know that having a disabled body does not mean the person is disabled by the limitations.
Yesterday when I got home from work, there was an email from Randy with a message to call him. I wasn't sure who he was like most of the time when a veteran contacts me. I called, left a message and he called me back last night. No one knows about the conversations I have with veterans and they never will unless the veteran wants to share something. In this case, after you read what he wrote, you'll know why this story is different.
Randy said he wanted to apologize for lying. Still not sure of who I was talking to, I could hear the emotion in his soft voice. After a while it sunk in that I posted his story but I was still confused over the apology. The thing about his story that was reported in the news, wasn't about his military service, but was about what he did with his life afterwards.
Had this story been about his service in the military with him thumping a chest full of medals that turned out to be one of the thousands of frauds running around the country trying to get something for themselves, I would have understood the pain in his voice as I spoke about forgiveness, but it wasn't. It was a story of a veteran taking something bad that happened to him and making lives better for others.
I asked him if he lied about any of that and he said he didn't. That was all I needed to know because the simple fact he wanted to find forgiveness for something few knew about was humbling as well as inspirational.
I thought about how many times I've screwed up as a human in my own life, just like everyone else. I thought about my Dad doing the whole AA steps of making amenze knowing it was out of his power what people did with it but in his power to change his own life from that moment on. Just like every other human on the planet we can't change the past but can change with the next breath we take.
In
Matthew 7, Jesus was addressing the difference between what men say and what they actually do.
You Will Know Them by Their Fruits
15 “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. 16 You will know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thornbushes or figs from thistles? 17 Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. 18 A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. 19 Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. 20 Therefore by their fruits you will know them.
The fruits of Randy's deeds are shown on the faces of all the kids and others he's met over the years. There will be some unable to acknowledge his actions are inspirational and change lives because they want to hold onto something wrong as if it will make them feel better about themselves.
Randy is like others in many ways. All of us can say whatever we want and many times we regret what we say. It takes a lot of courage to admit we were wrong and apologize. After being married for 30 years, I can attest to that fact of life and honestly I don't think I'm done needing to tell my husband I'm sorry for something plus the other way around. We've been married this long because we can see ourselves honestly knowing we are far from perfect. (I still haven't figured out how he puts up with me.)
Do Not Judge
7 “Judge not, that you be not judged. 2 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. 3 And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? 5 Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
When I told Randy he was already forgiven, he was quiet for extended time. Then he said "I do believe that." Then I asked him to do something for other veterans out there being tormented by something they think they did wrong. Knowing the power of forgiveness, I asked him to help others seek it for themselves. Without hesitation, he agreed. He knows what it feels like to have the weight on his soul but he also knows how being relieved of that empowers this moment on.
Randy showed courage when he joined the military just like everyone else along with compassion enough to be able to risk his life for the sake of others. Last night it required a tremendous about of courage for him to call someone like me not knowing how I would react or what I would do with what he had to say.
To Whom It May Concern:
I am writing this letter to acknowledge that I was dishonest about my military service. I have no excuse for my actions, dishonesty is dishonesty, and to those I have offended and or hurt I ask for your forgiveness. I did this with no malicious intent to hurt anyone or to gain anything, again to those I have hurt or offended I ask for your forgiveness.
After I was paralyzed and found myself dealing with all the medical issues and trying to learn how to live with being paralyzed, I wondered how many other people were dealing with the same thing. Thinking about all the things they will never be able to do again. I decided to start The View From 42, to help other people learn to live beyond their disabilities. Not knowing what it would become or how it would actually work. I have done no fundraiser; I have taken in no donations or financial contributions, I have funded everything from the beginning and to this date by myself. Do to some medical complications along the way things got put on hold for a time being. At first it was just going to be training service dogs for people, then after starting surfing and getting more active I realized how this help me and thought it could help other people.
People reached out to me for assistance with wheelchair purchases for their children, family members and or friends. Then people started asking if I could take them surfing, or help them get surfboards or wetsuits. I started of with tacking single individuals surfing with the help from volunteers. Bringing young people with disabilities and there families out for what we called a Southern California Surfing Experience. Then it turned into bigger one-day events with participants coming in from out of state. This was all done to help people with disabilities learn how to live beyond their disabilities, like I had done. A simple thing like a custom wheelchair or a surfing event put on just for them opens their mind to thinking about living their life beyond their disability. They start to see themselves as a person who has a disability instead of a disabled person. There is a difference, a big difference.
I still plan to continue to do this at whatever level I can; I am not sure how that will be now. This is a true honest desire just to help other people who have disabilities and have a desire to live beyond them.
Again I apologize for my dishonesty and misleading statements, and ask for your forgiveness.
Sincerely;
Randy
Email: pleasenojunk@mail.com
This was at the bottom of his email
A persons ability to enjoy life should not be hindered by their disability or their lack of accessibility to the world. Do not tell us what we can not do, help us do what we want to do.
