Y R U HERE

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
August 17, 2024

Have you ever wondered how someone healed long before you did? Was it because they had more support around them than you did? Sometimes, it isn't what or who is around them. Sometimes, it's because of what's within them they gain strength from.

Waiting for the traffic light to change, I noticed a license plate with YRU HERE. I smiled because it reminded me of all the times I wondered why I was here. Why are some of us born with brilliant minds, extraordinary talents, or passions that come with no explanation? Why are some born with kindness and humility while others seem hateful and egotistical?

Can it be because of the spirits within each of us that makes us so much different from others in our families? Are our spirits tested by circumstances or enhanced by what we survive?

Some people call spirits "souls," but Jesus clarified the term when He said, "God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth." He said that to a Samaritan woman at the well when the people of Samaria were hated by the Jews. Top that off with Jesus knowing she was a sinner, especially when she had five husbands, but He spoke to her with kindness and patience.

There is not much of that going on today when we hear "church" people in crowds cheering statements filled with anger, rage, and lies. I am referring not simply to political rallies but to church services. If you notice, the speakers and attendees have something in common. They do not refer to the New Testament but preach and speak according to the Old Testament. It's disturbing how they dare call themselves Christians but have absolutely nothing in common with what Jesus preached.

After a lifetime of faithful church attendance, I walked away. Not from my faith but the people not practicing what they claimed to be.

I've been through hell more times than I can count, but if strangers see me, they'd never guess I had any problems at all. I am not pretending to be happy. I am.

No matter what the universe tosses at me, I honor my feelings. I get angry, swear, sad, and cry, and I even get to the point where I run out of tears. I allow myself to feel hopeless until I am hopeful. There have been times when I am on the phone with someone I trust, crying during the beginning of our conversation and laughing toward the end. My emotional pain was released enough, so joy had room to move back in. I toss the crap out into the universe so it would evaporate.

I don't know why my spirit was sent to this earth, but it is connected to my passion. It is to help other people become happier after they become survivors of what happened to them. I know what it is like to feel alone, unable to open up about what was going on in my mind. I know what it was like waiting to get over it and return to the way I was before. I drank to numb the pain after spending the day being "busy" doing something to take my mind off what happened to me. After nearly an entire lifetime of agony, I tried it all.

Talking to someone who earned my trust so I could open up worked for me. It helped me consider their advice on what I could do for myself. My therapists knew why they were here—to help people like me heal as survivors. Psychologist friends I made while working also helped me when I was confused. They knew why they were here, too.

Dealing with trauma requires receiving whatever help we need. Sometimes, we need a therapist, but have you ever wondered why they choose it as a profession? My curiosity constantly overcomes my mouth, and I have to ask. Too often, the answer came back, appearing to be something they were told to say. The shocking answer came from the best therapist I had. She told me it was because she was as messed up as most of her patients until a therapist helped her heal. She wanted to do the same thing for others since she was a kid and needed one. Now, that was genuine honesty!

As vital as good therapists are, spiritual therapists are just as important. If you've ever wondered if God did it to you or saved you, you understand what surviving does to us while we are reluctant to ask the question aloud. It is something we need to discover which one is more plausible. Should we believe God caused the traumatic event or multiple events, then seeking spiritual help could cause us to become nauseous. Let me clarify that. God didn't do it to us as some kind of test. Many of us have heard someone say, "God only gives us what we can handle," and we believe it. The truth is, I think He is there to give me what I need to handle what happened to me.

As crazy as it may sound, writing to help others helps me heal and feeds my spirit. That may not be why my spirit came to this earth, but it is why I am here now.

So why are you here? Not since the beginning of your life, but as someone whose life was saved, you became a survivor, too?

Kathie Costos, author of the Ministers Of The Mystery Series The Scribe Of Salem, The Visionary Of Salem, and 13th Minister Of Salem