Friday, May 22, 2020

"...but you will not look for what you do not know is there."

Do not sit in despair, heal instead


Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
May 22, 2020

When you are suffering, you feel as if the earth is crushing you. Hope has been eroded away by the constant tide of pain returning instead of the relief you searched for.

Take comfort in knowing, it is not as if you do not deserve help. You have just been looking in the wrong places.


4 I sat there in despair, my spirit draining away, my heart heavy, like lead.
5 I remembered the old days, went over all you've done, pondered the ways you've worked,
6 Stretched out my hands to you, as thirsty for you as a desert thirsty for rain.
7 Hurry with your answer, God! I'm nearly at the end of my rope. Don't turn away; don't ignore me! That would be certain death.
8 If you wake me each morning with the sound of your loving voice, I'll go to sleep each night trusting in you. Point out the road I must travel; I'm all ears, all eyes before you.
9 Save me from my enemies, God - you're my only hope!
10 Teach me how to live to please you, because you're my God. Lead me by your blessed Spirit into cleared and level pastureland.
11 Keep up your reputation, God - give me life! In your justice, get me out of this trouble!
Psalm 143:4-11

You may find what you are looking for,
Look and you will find it - what is unsought will go undetected.

but you will not look for what you do not know is there.

You know you do not want to suffer anymore. If the only thing you are looking for is a way to end it, that is all you will find. Yet if you look for a way to live a better life, you will find it and be encouraged to find the next thing that will help you achieve all you hope to be.

Last night I called a veteran Marine I had worked with for a long time. The conversation started out with how repulsive suicide awareness is. As usual, I was sick to my stomach about what has been accepted as worthy of support because that is all people know. What they do not know, is much like how the rest of our conversation went.

He told me about how he has passed on all that he learned from me and saved lives. They turned around and passed it on to others, and save lives. That is how it is supposed to work!

My friend sought my help when he was ready. I had to have patience until he was ready. Although many times I wanted to smack him on the back of the head to make him listen, I had to wait. I let him know I was there simply by showing up.

His best friend was also suffering. I did not have a chance to help him and to this day I wish he had given me a chance to help him. He took his own life, which devastated my Marine friend. It took a while for him to trust me enough to talk, even longer for him to listen to me but he did.

I restored hope for him, cleared the crap he thought out of his mind and educated him on PTSD basics that he had never heard before. No one had ever told him that he had the power to heal already within him.

Well, a lot of work later, he did everything he could do for himself, invested the time, spent the energy, and took back his power from PTSD. Then he passed on the message to others.

He also rediscovered what Faith is supposed to be like. That God did not do it to him as some sort of punishment. He forgave himself for what he felt he did wrong. Forgave others for wrong they did to him. And then he accepted the healing power God had already given him within the same soul that caused him to be able to risk his life in the Marines.

Saving lives, doing whatever veterans could, came with the package, and so did the power to heal from what that would do to them.

If you are looking for a way out of despair, time to start looking in different places, beginning with what is already inside of you...your soul.
Sunday morning empowerment zone features Marine veteran filmed yesterday at the Orlando Nam Knights bikeweek party. His simple message is empowerment! Take control of your life from this moment on. It's up to you where you go from here!

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