Are They Worth Learning About How To Help Them?

Combat PTSD Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
April 22, 2017

When something is important to you, you learn all you can about it. You had to learn how to use a computer. You had to learn how to use your upgraded cell phone, take selfies, shoot video and all the text short cuts. If you have kids, you had to learn how to take care of them. You had to learn how to do your job by going to college and getting hands on training. So with everything worth learning about, why didn't you do that when the person you decided to share your life with came with a job that could kill them?

Isn't it time someone asked you that question?

Members of the military today, police officers, firefighters, first responders or veterans of past services, had jobs that they knew could have killed them. They were willing to do it with an abundance of courage, as well as compassion, otherwise known as love.

It is a part of them that we fell in love with. At a time before technology allowed instant communication and answers, I managed to learn about Vietnam and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder over three decades ago after I fell in love with my veteran. We're still married simply because he was important enough in my life, to be part of my life and I, a constant part of his.

Part of his life was struggling to heal from what his service did to him. Oh, sure I could have excused myself for not learning back then because no one was talking about it, but I could not justify myself if I did.

For almost as long as there has been fighting in Afghanistan and Iraq, I've been trying to help families learn the easy way by writing a book For The Love of Jack, His War My Battle. That came out in 2003. I started learning and working on helping them heal in 1982.

So what is your excuse? Why has it been all so easy for you to just jump on stuff that is popular but doesn't work like "raising awareness" or taking walks or sharing stupid push-up videos because everyone else is doing it? None of it has worked. Wouldn't it be better for you spend your time actually learning about PTSD and how you can help someone you love heal? Didn't you ever wonder if they are so worthy of the publicity, why didn't anyone learn how to help them heal instead of just talking about how many decided they'd rather die?

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.1 Corinthians 13:4-8New International Version (NIV)

How about you start to treat them as on your list of what is important to you today? The person you loved enough to want to share your life with is still in there under all the pain and scars their jobs caused. It's up to you to help them heal.

Here are some videos for you to start with,