No earthly reason

No earthly reason
by Kathie Costos
Wounded Times Blog
January 19, 2013

There is no earthly reason I am still alive today. I have been thinking about this since a very long phone call earlier today when I was asked about my work on PTSD. I told the caller that when we do what we believe we are pulled to do, then that is what we are supposed to do with our lives. If we follow that pull, everything we need to do it is within us.

After trauma people either believe God saved them or God did it to them. Yet when you understand Him enough, you know that He did not do anything to you. My life is proof of that.

All the earthly reasons would have finished me off. God made my soul. My parents made my body as genetically imperfect as theirs. My soul was designed to have the "keys" to do the work I was intended to do.

It was not God's will that my Dad decided to become a violent alcoholic but it was God's will that I survived the worst he did to my family and still have it within me to forgive him for what he did when he decided to stop drinking.

It was not God's will that the child pushed me over the side of a slide when I was 4 or God's will that my scull was cracked, I had a concussion and ended up with what we now call Traumatic Brain Injury. It was His will that the fall didn't kill me.

It was not God's will that a man decided to drive in the passing lane of the highway with bad breaks and unable to stop his car, hitting mine and sending my car into a spin, hitting the guardrail with such force, it was totaled but I not only walked away, I pushed it across 4 lanes of traffic into the breakdown lane. It was God's will I survived that time too.

It was not God's will that my ex-husband came home from work one night and decided I needed to die, so he began to beat me and had his hands on my throat when my landlady started to bang on the door after she called the police. It was God's will that I survived yet again.

It was not God's will that I miscarried twins and hemorrhaged so much so they had to abort the other twin. Again, it was God's will I survived that time too.

It was not God's will that the doctor delivering my daughter did not check the results of an infection he had been treating, causing me to walk around with an infection that turned my body into a septic system of death. It was God's will that I survived, only by then I begged Him to let me die. I was that sad. I thought all the times God saved me were wasted. Other people died from what I survived over and over again.

I am a simple person seeking a simple life but what I have been through God used. He did not create all of it but because there was something He did have planned for me the keys to me by others were already there.

The veterans and families I help, only need to be able to find what is already inside of them. Simple as that. The earthly reason tells us what makes sense but when it comes to the workings of the soul, we cannot find the answers seeking the things of this earth.

Had I listened to earthly advice, I would have left my husband long ago. I listened to where I was being pulled and because of that, I have been credited with saving many more lives but you know, as well as I do it was all done for me first.

If you understand the point of this post then you are the one I was supposed to write it for. If you don't, you will understand it someday. Look back at your own life and think about how you got through so much before and know, none of it was done to you by Him. You are here because He gave you what you needed to be here.