When no one wants to accept the painful outcome

He served in the Army. Now he serves in the National Guards. The Army doesn't want to accept responsibility for what his service did to him any more than the National Guard does. If you think we take care of our veterans, read this and understand we are far from it.

Safe at home, a soldier struggles with PTSD

Paul Raines saw a close friend burn to death after an explosion in Baghdad. Another soldier in his unit was shot in the neck, and Raines experienced almost daily mortar and rocket attacks.

When he returned in 2006 after a year in Iraq, the Frederick man chalked these up as the realities of war. He did not seek treatment.

Five years later, Raines -- who joined the National Guard after being discharged from the Army -- says he has post-traumatic stress disorder and a litany of medical issues that have led to a downward spiral in his life.

"It's still fresh as the day I got back," Raines, 30, said in an interview at his home. "The day-to-day stuff, that's the thing that upsets me the most."

Now that he is seeking help, Raines said, the problem is bureaucracy. The National Guard and the Army go back and forth over who should address his problems because they arose when he served in Iraq.

The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs will not give him full disability benefits, Raines said, because he continues to serve in the Guard, which he joined after four years of Army active duty ended in 2007.

He is a specialist with the 291st Army Liaison Team out of Adelphi and his contract runs until 2013.

He cannot drive through downtown Frederick because it reminds him of Baghdad. He wakes up in the middle of the night unaware that he is safe at home. He often forgets whether he has eaten that day.

"They just leave him damaged and walk away and don't even care," Jessica Raines said. "You feel like you're fighting a war with your own country. He fought for our country."

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