When getting up is so very hard to do

by
Chaplain Kathie

There are songs dealing with breaking up but I can't think of one that deals with getting up at all. Can you? Have you ever had one of those days when you thought it would have been better to just stay safely in your own bed for the day? Sometimes days can just be as if you woke up in someone else's life and everyone is out to get you.

It could start out with your coffee pot not being in the machine right leaving it to over top where they grounds come out. Not only do you get to miss your cup of wake up, you get to clean up the gritty mess from the counter and the floor. If the day is really out to get you, you're already dressed for work and get dripped coffee all over your clothes. Nice!

Then getting in your car, you notice your neighbor's new roof also gave you a gift of a nice big nail in your rear tire.

All the way going to work, already late, every driver must have received the same text message saying you were on the road so they could all meet to get you pissed off. They cut you off and then slow down. The guy behind you keeps getting closer. The driver next to you keeps playing games trying to turn the highway into a huge bumper car rally.

You don't know how you made it but when you do pull into the parking lot, there aren't any spaces left. This never happened before because you were always on time for work, finding plenty of spaces near the door. Oh, no, not this day. You end up parking in an adjacent lot. Walking to your own building, your heal breaks.

Next comes the ribbing you take from your coworkers for this one day you are late when the last 10 years you've been early but no one noticed those times. You get called into the office by the new boss without a clue what your record has been.

You're so upset, you make the biggest mistake of your career and snap at the owner of the company. Somehow you managed to not get fired but you didn't need anyone to tell you how close you were to losing your job that day but everyone you talked to managed to make sure you got the message.

Going home it's the same group of other drivers out to get you. Your body screams "I need a drink!" By the time you get ready for bed, you are still not sure who's life you were in that day, because no of it was normal for you.

This is life with PTSD.

It's one day after another when it seems as if the world is out to get you. This comes from paranoia. It creates a conspiracy against you and it's all personal to you.

The drivers out to get you are not driving down streets in America, but in Iraq, Afghanistan, Kuwait, Vietnam, Korea, or any of the other places all over the world veterans risked their lives in. This comes from flashbacks without warning.

Nothing is normal to them so they think they are no longer normal either. They think they are living in someone else's body. They don't think the same, feel the same or most of the time, they don't even look the same when they see their reflection in the mirror.

Each day is a challenge to find reasons to get up out of bed but they push themselves as the last remnant of hope remains to cling to. Maybe today the VA will approve their claim and everything will be wonderful again? Maybe today the drink in the class will be a soda instead of beer or whisky? Maybe the pack of cigarettes will last more than a few hours? Maybe today the hands won't shake so much? Maybe the TV will be on and watched instead of just sitting in front of it without a single clue what was on?

When they live with family members it becomes maybe today there won't be an argument.

They go to bed after living someone else's life. For them, it's not a matter of bad days once in a while. It's everyday is bad until they get help to heal and reclaim their lives. When they do the "maybe shreds of hope" turn into reality and life becomes maybe tomorrow it will be even better. It happens. It takes a lot of work to get there, but it's been done throughout the centuries man has walked on this planet.

Next time you have a day that only Satan could have conjured up for you, think about how hard it was to get through it and then know what it's like to have PTSD when everyday is like that. Maybe you won't be so quick to judge anyone else ever again. Maybe you can find it in your heart to actually talk to a veteran so that you can make their day a little better? Maybe you won't walk by another homeless person with a sign saying homeless veteran the next time? Maybe when the Vietnam Vets call you to tell you there will be a truck in your area in case you have something to donate, you won't hang up the phone without even thinking if there is anything in your house you really don't need but someone else may?