Cosmic coincidence of prayers heard

My mouth just dropped wide open. I couldn't believe what I was reading.

When War Comes Home:

Christ-centered healing for wives of combat veterans

Authors: Chris Adsit, Rahnella Adsit, Marshele Carter Waddell

Copyright @ 2008

Available through www.militaryministry.org


When War Comes Home: Christ-centered Healing for Wives of Combat Veterans offers comfort and practical help to the wives of combat veterans struggling with the hidden wounds of war, including Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Insights from the medical and counseling community are wrapped in biblical principles and the shared experiences of other military wives. The reader will:

understand what happened to her husband – spiritually, psychologically and physiologically

understand how her husband’s trauma symptoms are affecting her

learn how to deal positively with grief, loss and forgiveness issues associated with PTSD

learn how to build her own “healing place,” develop her support network, and know when and how to find physical safety

understand and focus on her true identity in Christ

recognize the real enemy and how to fight spiritual warfare

learn how she can contribute to her husband’s healing environment

learn how to construct a safe, healthy environment for her children

understand the process of moving on to a “new normal”

Have you ever seen too many words combine into a sledgehammer? Stay with me on this because either this is just some kind of weird cosmic coincidence or yet again my work has been used for someone else's advantage. I've been out here long enough to know what was being done and when it was being done to know when I was ahead of the pack and this is one of them.

This book was apparently written last year. Mine, when I talked about a "new kind of normal" was in 2002. I devoted a chapter to the soul along with telling the story of 18 years of life with my husband. It's been free online for the last few years and before that for sale from Amazon, Barnes and Nobel plus other online book sellers. The next thing is in 2006, I did the first video about coming home for the families. It was titled, When War Comes Home. Since then there has been When War Comes Home part two and these were after Wounded Minds when I laid it all out in a video that ran 28 minutes. These videos are still online but only from my website, this blog and Great Americans. Between the time I made them and pulled them off YouTube, they were there plus on Google. Anyone in this field or with an interest in it has been able to find them pretty easily. There are now over 25 of them.

While the way these videos were put together was not a new venue, the idea of doing it for PTSD, blending an educational video with music and images was not being done. Now they are all over the net. It was so new that someone in the Navy emailed me about showing one of the videos to Marines coming back from Iraq.

The really striking part is that there is one more tie to all of this. PTSD Not God's Judgment. This is another video I did. I was contacted by Military Ministries 6/4/2008 1:13:50 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time.

Cosmic coincidence from people working along the same lines, getting lead in the same direction? God's SOS to be heard?

I don't know. What I do know is that while I've been working on this since 1982, there is much I worked hard to learn and be able to do. That said, there is also a lot of things I do I know I should not be capable of doing but somehow it all comes together. There are times when I read something I wrote later on and wonder where it came from, stunned that the words came out of my mind blended the way they were. Those are the times when I know I have been lead by a much greater voice than mine.

Put it this way. When we pray to God, rest assured He hears your prayers. We all tend to envision Him snapping His fingers to deliver what we ask for, but that's not the way it happens. When we pray to God, He talks to the people able to answer the prayers and leads them to get it done. Sometimes they respond as God tugs their hearts, fills their minds and fuels their compassion. Other times, they ignore it. When that happens, prayers are not answered. People don't blame other people. They end up blaming God and walking away from Him. I try very hard to listen and let Him lead the way. I know that when it comes to a lot of things, I mess up too much so I trust Him a lot more than myself.

My ego right now wants to scream my work has been used by someone else for their own glorification. That's my ego talking. My spirit however wants to think that God has not just been talking to me but a lot of other people about PTSD and a lot of other people have received the same message. Some people just took longer to hear Him.

Considering the magnitude of number of cases we have to face in the next couple of years, this is going to require thousands of people working on PTSD great than what we have now. So far I've been great on the information end, finding reports on PTSD and delivering what I know in easy to digest forms but when it comes to everything else that it takes to become well known, I'm too inadequate with that. I spend my days researching and corresponding with veterans and their families, developing videos and constantly searching for answers. I find it very difficult to promote myself or what I do. There are things I'm just no good at. God managed to find people that can do what I can't so that's not such a bad thing.

I'm trying to look at all this the way I look at it when therapists email me for copies of my videos. They use them all over the country and I never know how many people see them, how they are received or how much they help. I just have to trust when I get more emails asking for them that I'm on the right track.

If you are in this line of work, you need to do the same thing. Is this about your own ego or helping others? Is this about being famous or saving them? I wouldn't mind being better well known but this was never about publicity. I didn't even use my married name until this year when my husband asked why I was still using Costos instead of DiCesare. All these years and no one had any clue who I was. It certainly wasn't about money because all these years and I never made any money at it. My book is an indication of that since it's been online for free. It was not until the last couple of years when I had to travel more and spend more on licensing and insurance that my expenses increased to the point where there were too many of them for me to be able to write off on my taxes that I knew I had to take donations. Up until this month, I wasn't even listed as a 501c3. So no fame, no fortune, yet I work 70 hours a week and cannot even get my name on my mortgage because I have no income. So top that off with humiliation for someone who once earned more than her husband. Take ego off the list too. I simply do it for love. Love for my husband and compassion for what I know too many other families go through with all of this.

Most of the people I know doing this work have "skin in the game" because they either have PTSD or have someone they love with it. No one walks into any of this without being pulled into it. Some just do it out of the goodness of their hearts because of a calling they received to help. No matter why you got into this, remember why you got into this.

Just as doctors and nurses could be making a lot more money working in the private sector instead of the VA, they go to work for the VA because of who the VA serves. They do it for the veterans. We do it for people suffering with the kind of pain only we can understand even though we were not there. We don't all walk in their shoes but we can walk by their side. I understand them because I understand my husband. I understand the spouses because I understand how human I still am. In all of this, there is someone a lot bigger, stronger, smarter and capable of all of us put together. Let Him lead the way to answer the prayers of others. Set your own ego aside and remember that what you are able to give was given first to you by Him. That does not mean He didn't give it to someone else as well. I think the authors of When War Comes Home got the same message at the same time I did but it just took them longer to answer it.