Veteran struggle to truly come home

Veterans struggle to truly come home
4/4/2009 1:05:02 AM

By Jeff Hansel

Post-Bulletin, Rochester MN

After returning stateside from serving in the Gulf War in 1991, Gabe Cruz had a stable job.

He was a surveillance specialist with the Lubbock, Texas, Health Department, tracking the incidence of sexually transmitted diseases in the west Texas population. He was considered a public health expert, especially in the field of HIV/AIDS.

"I oversaw 42 counties. I dressed in shirts and ties and I worked in nice clothes," he says.

But he experienced a personal tragedy and an emotional breakdown at work, and he lost his job. Anything can trigger such an unexpected downward spiral for veterans who might think they've returned to normalcy.

"I went crazy," Cruz says, showing his disability documents that state, "you were found running barefoot in the street, claiming people were shooting at you."

He had a flat tire and "I just started crying. I couldn't get it together."

While on active duty, most routine things are predetermined, so changes in routine can throw off veterans.

"I remember one guy getting off the plane, met his wife and family at the airport, went to have a meal and felt completely overwhelmed because the waitress put a menu in his hand," said Katie Burnes, a psychiatric nurse practitioner who helps soldiers at the VA Clinic in Rochester. "Because he didn't have to choose anything. He didn't have to choose what to eat for 16 months. And he didn't know how to act. He didn't know how to respond."

Cruz uses the disability statement as if it's proof for non-believers.

"I read it over and over (because) I forget," Cruz says. "I think any logical person would say they'd want to forget the worst parts."

He has formed a relationship with a woman and her two children, but he struggles. In post-war relationships, when a woman rolls her eyes in response to his behavior, he says, he knows it's over.

"I sleep in the garage because I don't want the kids to see me. ... It's cold in the garage. It's more embarrassing, though, if they were to see me," he says.

Severe panic attacks are the problem. Any unexpected noise can set one off.
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Veterans struggle to truly come home
Post-Bulletin - Rochester,MN,USA