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Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Remembering a hero Sgt. Coleman Bean

Remembering a hero
Family and friends mourn the loss of Coleman Bean, 25
BY BRIAN DONAHUE Staff Writer
Coleman Bean was a lot of things to a lot of people. He was a son, a brother, a soldier, and to seemingly everyone who knew him, a good friend. He was someone they could count on to be there, in times of need and in happy times.

When he took his life on Sept. 6, he left those who knew him in shock. But he also left them with 25 years of cherished memories, the kind that could only come from a fun and thoughtful kid who became a loving, caring young man. It's Coleman's indelible character, and not the way he left, that his East Brunswick family — his parents Greg and Linda, younger brother Paddy and older brother Nick — will always hold on to.

Greg Bean, who is executive editor of Greater Media Newspapers, knows how he'll recall his middle son. Most prominent in his mind is the memory of Coleman stopping by unannounced the night before he died.

"I was sitting here watching TV, and he poked his face in the dining room window and made a funny face at me," Greg recalled, adding that Coleman, living in South River after returning from his second tour in Iraq, had been dropping over for dinner often, knowing Greg was on leave from work and was cooking a lot.

"He came in and said, 'What'd you make for dinner?' I said, 'I didn't know you were coming, so I didn't make enough for you.' So he made a triple-decker peanut butter sandwich and chips, and sat here and talked baby talk to my new dog, who he had just fallen in love with. … But I'm going to remember that night, because he was just happy and joking, and we made plans to go to the movies the next day and to the gym together on Monday. … I've got a million memories; we went through pictures the other day, and all of them bring back lots and lots of memories, but the one I'm gonna keep with me is just the way he was the day before he died."

In the early hours of the next morning, the family would learn, Coleman got into a one-car accident in West Long Branch, was hospitalized briefly, returned home to his apartment in South River and shot himself. His family and friends would react with shock and sadness, and also with anger that he would leave them this way.

Greg Bean's anger is also directed at the U.S. Army. After Coleman returned from nearly a year in Iraq in 2004, he was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) for issues including extreme anxiety attacks and depression. Despite the diagnosis, the Army sent him back to the war in 2007.

"He had gone to the V.A. and seen a bunch of people [at] the Lyons campus. … He was diagnosed with PTSD and some other troubling issues, just lingering issues from Iraq," his father said. "The problem is that the V.A. doesn't really have anything to do directly with the Army. When he got called back, the Army said, 'Well, we don't care what the V.A. says about you. If you want a deferment from that, you have to get it from an Army psychiatrist.' "

Coleman feared that if he went to an Army psychiatrist, he'd spend the next deployment cleaning latrines or some other unwanted duty.

"The fact that he was diagnosed with [PTSD] didn't have any impact on him being deployed a second time. I think that's wrong. I think that's horrible that a soldier could be seeing a Veterans Administration doctor and that carries no weight with our Army," Greg said.
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http://ems.gmnews.com/news/2008/0917/front_page/015.html

10 comments:

  1. Thank you very much for posting this story about Coleman. He was a wonderful man, whom I feel lucky to have met. He was kind, funny and just a great all around guy. His story is to important to be pushed to the back burner. The service for him was heartbreaking, yet in honored him in a way that he deserved to be. I hope his family knows that those of us that knew him, we think about him and you all the time. There is a beautiful tribute to him on U Tube which was created by my sister. Help spread his story. Maybe together, we can help to save someone as we were unable to save Coleman. Again, thank you for helping to keep his story going.
    ~Courtney

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  2. Hi Courtney,
    I'm trying very hard to keep all their stories alive. PTSD is an enemy and needs to be treated like one because it kills far more than war itself could do. We lose more after war than we do during it, but not enough people know that.

    It's a wound. These men and women end up dying from this wound but they are not counted as if they did. They ram cars into walls. They crash their motorcycles. They put guns to their heads, swallow hand fulls of pills and tie ropes around their necks. None of this has to happen and it wouldn't if we tried to train them when they come home as much as we train them to go.

    I'll be sure to check out the video and hope you watch mine. They are all online and on this blog.

    Courtney, we're getting to them but not nearly as many needing it. Keep trying. Keep fighting for them. I do it for my husband. He's a Vietnam Vet with PTSD. I'm blessed to still have him with me. We've been married for 24 years.

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  3. I also thank you for posting this article. His life and those of all deceased soldiers should always be held close to our hearts. Those that survived should be held just as close. I remember when friends of mine returned home from Vietnam, no parades, no help offered. Those who are still with us had a very rough road to travel.

    No serviceman should be sent back for a second tour. Coleman was a gift to this country. was a brave and caring man who deserved to live a good and happy life.

    Little did we know on that on that beautiful September morning how many actual victims there would be so a many years later.

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  4. Hi Carol

    It takes people who care enough to talk about it to save the lives of others. You are doing that and bless you for that.

    I just did a post on Pfc. Joseph Dwyer. He had PTSD too and died because of it. His home town is naming a street after him. I'm glad. It goes a long way in taking the shame out of this wound when no other wound would be something to feel any shame over.

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  5. If I may ask, how did you hear about Coleman? I am recently in contact with his father and he and his wife are trying to get to Washington to help get his story out and get something started to help other soldiers. I am on a blog daily, and yesterday our awesome 'blog mistress' did a blog for Coleman, I hope you take a look. Actually, the video is there as well. www.caregiversinsight.com

    I will make sure to check in here as often as I can.

    It's a wonderful thing that you are doing! Someone needs to stand up for our soldiers, so let it be us 'civilians'

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  6. Hi Courtney,
    I track PTSD across the country and internationally. This blog is only a year old but my other blog has tracked it online since 2005 and before that I was on an AOL blog.
    I also make videos on PTSD. One of them, Death Because They Served was all about suicides. That video has over a hundred names on it and a lot of their stories. The video is no longer on line but if you go to my web site at www.namguardianangel.com there is a link to Power Points. Look for Death Because They Served and you can read their stories. While researching this I found about 800 non-combat deaths.
    I hope you know what the numbers are. We lose over 6,000 a year in the VA system alone and another 10,000 try to commit suicide.
    With Vietnam veterans we lost 117,000 by 1986. Two studies put their suicide deaths between 150,000 and 200,000, but I think that number is low. There are a lot we will never know about because the family never made the connection between the suicide and Vietnam. Even now there are very few people that know what PTSD is.

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  7. I am educating myself every day about the numbers. Being someone who has always had someone I care for in this war since it has started, I have always tried to do my best to educate myself. My friend and I are going to set up a blog as well for stuff like this, and would like to know if it is ok that we put a link to your site? We also want to help anyone that suffers from PTSD, especially our soldiers. I will check in often!

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  8. Hi Courtney,
    You can link to mine if you want. Or maybe you could join mine. This blog is getting too big to handle by myself. Email me and we'll talk. namguarianangel@aol.com

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  9. I dont know why I torment myself and insist on reading everything I find about Coleman.

    Coleman was a friend of mine, since we lost Coleman, I have made two videos on youtube, in his honor, and another explaining PTSD, and showing what could happen (Coleman story), I've made shirts and tell everyone I come across about him, and PTSD, I have a friend right now suffering with it, among other issues who is going to be deployed for his second tour, to the red zone in afganistan, and I fear for him. Glad to see someone else out there, is working on getting PTSD out there.

    I truly believe we lost Coleman, as a wake up call, and I very much so believe, he left us, so that we can save a life, id like to see atleast 10 thousand views on both of my videos combained, because than that would mean atleast 20 thousand people are made aware, by word of mouth or seeing the videos.

    Thank you for this story.

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  10. Hi Carlyn,
    The people doing the most work on this are doing it because "they have skin in the game" and do it out of love. That's what you're doing. That's what I'm doing.
    Don't lose heart over the hits for the videos. I have over 20 of them now and the hits, well, they are not that great but I have to tell you for the people commenting and emailing me, they are really helped by them. I think even if they do not walk away with retaining the information, they are comforted because someone cared enough to do it.
    Put the videos into God's hands and believe that whomever needs to find it, will. That's what gets me through this. All the hours and effort are getting to the people that need to know it. It's a labor of love but you know that already. Don't give up fighting to help others then Coleman's life will live on.

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